Fiesta 10k

I have no pictures from the Fiesta 10k. It, in my opinion, was my worst race. Ever. My time actually was not that bad - 1:03. That's a minute slower then my PR at the Turkey Trot 10k in MD which considering that I walked a good bit of it, is not so bad. Lots of people rave about this run; I personally was not impressed. There are so many beautiful places to run in Pensacola, there was nothing scenic or charming about this run except for maybe the last mile that was through downtown. It started up by the airport and had a decent hill or two at the start. I didn't have any problems until around mile 2.5-3. I had been sick a lot lately with allergies and I just felt awful. I couldn't breath. I would walk a little bit, then I would run, then I couldn't breath, so I would walk some more. There was a lot of people along the course cheering the runners on. Every time people would cheer I'd force myself to run. It was just awful. At one point we ran along heavy traffic and the fumes just made my stomach queasy. I had never been so happy to see a finish line in my life.
Chris and the kids had come to the race but they weren't any where along the course or at the finish. I just felt completely alone and deflated. I don't normally run by myself, and I've only ever ran one or two races without a friend. It's hard to explain. I was so happy to have finished and not given up, but yet I felt horrible. My head hurt. My lungs hurt. My pride hurt. I found that on runs when I'm just not feeling good that I'm my own worst enemy. I kept telling myself how bad I was, why do I bother running, I'm not any good at it, I'm a failure, etc, etc, etc.

One thing I decided after the run was no more races for awhile. I want to enjoy the experience especially when I'm paying for it, and this just wasn't fun. The next thing was to start running by myself a few times a week. I needed to spend some time with just myself and the pavement. Time alone to work on positive thoughts and not negative thoughts. I don't ever want to be in another race where I spend the time telling myself how horrible of a runner I am. That's not why I run. It was a hard lesson.